Keeping Routines While Honoring the Joy of New Experiences

December 22, 2025

As we prepare for the holiday season, many of us look forward to the joyful energy of visitors, celebrations, and time spent together. Yet even the most welcome changes can shift daily rhythms, affecting children and adults alike. 


In Montessori philosophy, routines provide a sense of order and security, essential ingredients for children’s growing independence and emotional well-being. Balancing these familiar structures with the excitement of new experiences can help all of us enjoy the season with greater calm and connection.


Recognizing What Children Communicate


When children’s behavior shifts during times of change, it often reflects their environment. New faces, altered schedules, and fluctuating parental attention can all contribute to feelings of uncertainty. Instead of viewing potential behavior shifts as unwelcome, we can interpret them as valuable communication, essentially our children’s way of expressing a need for stability and reassurance.


One of the most powerful responses we can provide is simple presence. Taking a few moments to sit beside our children, observe their play, or join them in a familiar activity can quickly restore their sense of connection. Even brief, focused attention can help children feel grounded and secure, allowing their natural cooperation and joy to reemerge.


Once children feel calm and connected, they are better able to engage in conversations about upcoming changes. During these connected moments, we can explain that routines (mealtimes, bedtimes, or daily activities) may look different during the holidays. These conversations help children prepare for the adjustments ahead and strengthen their trust in the adults guiding them.


Preparing for Change Together


Taking some simple steps before family gatherings or holidays can help children understand what lies ahead. Children thrive on predictability, so talking about what will remain consistent and what will change reduces anxiety and increases their capacity to adapt.


  • What routines will stay the same?
  • What might be different during this time?
  • Which activities or traditions are most meaningful to us?


Creating a visual calendar or using a whiteboard to map out plans gives children a concrete way to anticipate events. Inviting them to help with small preparations, such as choosing decorations, helping plan meals, or organizing activities, empowers them to feel capable and included.


Finding Joy in Shared Experiences


While routines provide comfort, flexibility also allows us to experience the joy of spontaneity. The holidays offer a wonderful opportunity to create shared moments such as storytelling, baking together, making crafts, or simply taking a walk outdoors. These experiences help build memories that connect generations.


Inviting extended family members to share stories or recollections from past gatherings can also be grounding. Collecting these memories, perhaps in a family scrapbook or memory journal, creates continuity across time and reminds children that they are part of a larger story.


Children and relatives alike often find satisfaction in contributing to family life. Tasks such as preparing vegetables, setting the table, or folding napkins offer children a sense of purpose and belonging. In true Montessori fashion, participation is more valuable than perfection.


Creating New Rhythms with Intention


The holiday season invites us to find balance between the comfort of familiar routines and the excitement of new experiences. By planning thoughtfully, staying flexible, and responding to children’s needs with empathy, we can approach these times with harmony and joy.


In Montessori education, rhythm and order are seen as foundations for growth, while curiosity and discovery fuel the joy of learning. This holiday season, let’s bring this kind of balance into our homes. By honoring both structure and spontaneity, we create an environment where children feel secure, connected, and free to delight in the world around them. 


Let us know more about your holiday rituals and rhythms! Once the season settles, come visit our school here in Bozeman, MT.


Teacher helping children at a table with a board game in a classroom
July 30, 2026
Come see the Montessori environment in action! Now enrolling for the 2026-2027 school year.
montessori children with guide in tea lesson
June 26, 2026
We’re opening our doors for a special campus tour and we'd love for you to join us!
Three young children sitting on a couch, smiling in a bright indoor room.
June 15, 2026
Connect the Montessori classroom to nature. Discover how exploring Montana’s rivers helps young children develop spatial awareness and environmental respect.
Two children kneel on a classroom rug behind a colorful block maze on the floor.
June 1, 2026
In the Montessori tradition, we talk a lot about "following the child." Sometimes people mistake this for letting a child do whatever they want. But as those of us who have been in the trenches know, following the child actually means observing them through developmental periods so thoughtfully that we understand what they need before they even have the words for it. When it comes to mental health, this observation is our greatest tool, as it helps us prepare. Mental health in childhood includes resilience, the security of belonging, and the development of an "inner voice" that tells a child they are capable, eventually serving as their source of internal guidance. Supporting this development requires us adults to shift from being managers of their behavior to loving guardians of their emotional environment. The Foundation: Safety and Routine For children in the first plane of development (birth to age 6), the groundwork for mental health is laid through warm, secure relationships. In Montessori terms, this is the "prepared environment” of connection. We often say that children need consistency like they need air. We provide stability through routine—not a rigid schedule, but a predictable rhythm. When a child knows what comes next, their nervous system relaxes. Simple acts like involving them in everyday moments—letting them slice a banana or fold washcloths—give them a sense of agency. A child who contributes to the world around them is a child who feels capable and valued. This sense of "I can do it" is important, and sometimes we just have to get out of the way. The Elementary Years: The Why and the Who As children move into the second plane of development (ages 6–12), their mental health needs shift toward social belonging and moral understanding. This is the age of "Why?" and "That’s not fair!" At this stage, adults can check in on their feelings through everyday events. Did they get into a fight with their friend? Don’t rush to fix the sadness. Instead, sit with them in it. We can support their mental health by giving them the tools to solve their own social problems. Ask, "What do you think would help you feel better?" rather than handing them the solution. This builds the self-efficacy that helps buffer against anxiety and depression later in life. Learning the Hard Way Mental health isn't about avoiding the scary or hard things that come with growing up; it's about making sure your child never has to face them alone. It’s about cuddles, and hugs, and playing with your kids. It’s about recognizing that a tantrum isn't an attack on your parenting—it’s a child whose inner "prepared environment" has temporarily collapsed, and they need you to help them rebuild it. The Parent’s Work (The Inner Preparation) In Montessori, the "prepared adult" must do their own inner work to best be able to guide a child. Parenting can feel messy, and it rarely looks like the peaceful, perfectly-balanced life we might have imagined. Here is how to keep your own foundation solid: Honoring the "Gap": Make peace with the fact that your reality may not match your expectations. There will be days when you are not the “calm, cool and collected“ model you want to be. Forgive yourself. Your children don’t need a perfect parent; they need a regulated one who can apologize when they mess up and move forward. Mindful Co-Parenting: Whether you live in the same house or two, communication between co-parents must be clear and boundary-honoring. Children are emotional barometers; they feel the pressure of unspoken conflict. Aim for "functional transparency"—share the necessary information about the child’s needs without using the child as a messenger. Self-Care is Not a Luxury: You cannot pour from an empty vessel. In the Montessori classroom, a tired, burnt-out adult is not the example we want to set, nor is it an effective one. Taking ten minutes for a quiet tea or a solo walk isn't "ignoring" your kids; it’s calibrating your instrument so you can be the calm center they need. Boundaries as Love: Setting a boundary for yourself ("I need 5 minutes of quiet before I can help with that") teaches your child that you are a human with needs. This honors your humanity and models for them how to protect their own mental health in the future.
Children sit in a circle around a teacher at a table, sharing a small activity in a classroom.
May 18, 2026
Overbooking your child's summer? Learn why unstructured downtime and embracing a little boredom are vital for nurturing your child's creativity.
Montessori child working in the classroom
May 18, 2026
We’re opening our doors for a special campus tour and we'd love for you to join us! 
May 4, 2026
Discover how Montessori education champions character development, physical autonomy, and personal best over the cultural pressure of competition.
A child with hair in small buns sits at a wooden table, painting on a sheet of paper with a small brush.
April 27, 2026
Discover how peer learning, meaningful context, adult interaction, and order align Montessori with the science of how children learn best.
Two children hang pieces of fabric on a wooden drying rack inside a classroom.
April 20, 2026
Does Montessori work? Explore the research behind movement, choice, interest, and intrinsic motivation in Montessori: The Science Behind the Genius.
Show More